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How can you set up your dog for success in this exciting, sometimes challenging, new family dynamic before the baby arrives?
Having been through this twice and with my positive dog trainer/Family Paws educator experience, I want to share what you need to know and what to do to help your dog live happily and safely with your new baby at every stage.
Let's dive in...
You can see all this in the accompanying webinar below including photos and videos elaborating on key info and strategies.
Dog parents often lament that we wish our dogs could talk. It's true our dogs don't speak to us in words, but they are talking to us all the time. We just need to know how to listen (usually with our eyes) and know how to understand and respond.
Learning how to understand your dog’s communication is an important first step in setting your pup up for success with your new baby.
Family Paws Education has a saying: "Eyes, ears, tail, muzzle, gather the clues to solve the puzzle!" That's just a rhyming, memorable way of reminding us to observe your dog's body language constantly to have an ongoing conversation with and support your dog.
Our dogs are constantly telling us a lot...
You can see visual examples in the accompanying slides linked below but here are key body language signs to watch for in your dog:
Face
Eyes
Ears
Spine/posture
Tail
Mouth
The more you know your dog's stress signals and when they're likely to appear, the more you'll be able to anticipate and preempt any tricky situations.
Most, if not all, of these things are likely happenings as a natural part of having a new baby. It's worth taking a minute to ask yourself each of these and think through how you plan to handle it now when you're not in the moment and under pressure of this major life change.
Remember, know your dog! You know how and if your pup will react to new sounds and baby items around the house. Now is the time to plan what you can do to make your new family member's arrival comfortable for everyone, especially your dog.
When we talk about a training plan and how you'll want to manage all things dog and baby, it's important to include everyone who is on your support team, all family members plus any dog walker, etc. Consistency is always key with dogs, and with so much newness in your dog's life now when you bring a baby home, having humans in sync is critical.
It's always helpful to think not about what you don't want your dog to do, but what you do want your dog to do in any given situation. Then you can prepare your pup with positive reinforcement skills that become your go-to's to set up everyone for success.
It's a good idea to think about each of these and what behaviors your dog can fall back on for calm and comfort.
What are the basic skills and behaviors you want your dog to own? These are the cues and skills you'll call on when you need to keep everything going smoothly.
If your dog doesn't already have these skills or if both of you could use a refresher, check out the Manners Channel here on Dogly where you'll find guides dedicated to how to teach them.
You'll also find my series on the super useful "go to mat" here.
Even if your dog is solid on these skills, it's a good idea to practice and strengthen them now. Get a jump on refreshing them in the context of how they're likely to come up once you're focusing on a baby at the same time.
What does that mean?
Try this
Try your go-to cues with your dog from all these positions likely to be your norm after your baby arrives. Changing the picture now can make adjustments easier when you're actually in these situations with a baby.
What other changes will happen in your environment when your baby comes home?
Think about how to get your dog used to those changes in a positive way now. If you'll be using special equipment around the house, start setting up and practicing using it. Get your dog comfortable with the sight, smell, and sound of baby items before they become associated with the new family member's arrival.
Now is a good time to start setting up and desensitizing your dog to feel comfortable around:
Check out my full guide to desensitization here on Dogly if you'd like a step-by-step how-to for helping your dog feel comfortable around all the newness.
Whether you're planning to have your baby at home or at a hospital, you will want to make plans for your dog for before, during, and after the baby arrives.
Plan answers to questions like:
All these questions are important to think through to help your dog be as calm and comfortable on the days surrounding all the initial excitement of a new family member.
Like everything else dog and baby, bringing your baby home can go smoothly and happily for all with some upfront planning. You know your individual dog -- think about these questions as you create your homecoming plan and how you'll introduce your dog to the new baby.
Here's a look at our plan in our particular situation with two dogs and having the birth at home:
Over time, your dog will naturally get used to new baby sounds, each baby smell, and your individual baby's scent around your home without forcing the process.
For more why and how details of homecoming plans for dogs and babies, take a look at my complete guide focusing on homecoming here.
The main thing to remember when bringing your new baby home:
Homecoming doesn’t require a formal introduction.
The ideal reaction from your dog is a “no big deal” reaction. A relaxed dog is safer than an over-aroused dog.
How to use "success stations to make success the only option for your dog. Success stations are areas of your house that are dog-proofed and baby-proofed where your baby and dog can safely coexist.
Management doesn’t mean turning your four-legged family member into backyard or isolated dogs! Using management helps foster safe inclusion in family activities.
Dogs can’t learn about their strange new roomies without safe exposure.
Set up success stations throughout your home, everywhere you're likely to spend time in your daily activities. Using baby gates, play yards, or other tools, you can create boundaries that allow your dog to be comfortable while still seeing you and being near the action with the baby.
You can learn more about how to set up success stations along with other management tools in my guide here on Dogly on setting up your space for everyone's success.
Enrichment helps keep dogs both stimulated and relaxed at any time and is especially helpful keeping a dog's behavior at an even keel when newborn babies join the family.
How and why to engage your dog's senses in enrichment as part of your dog's routine:
Get creative!
Having varied enrichment activities available will help you keep your dog occupied and entertained while you are busy getting to know your new family member, especially during the first few days. Creating multiple opportunities to let your dog sniff and use their brains channels extra energy in a positive, calming way.
Try these enrichment ideas to vary your dog's experiences:
Just as you do in your home, on family outings think "dog and baby on the scene, parent is in between." Think about exactly how it's going to play out to set everyone up for a smooth, safe, and happy outing:
And as always, know your dog!
Focus on comfortable coexistence first between your dog and baby, then think creatively about ways your baby can enjoy your dog without physical contact. Then we can begin hand-over-hand petting, and discussions about consensual contact.
Try this
Development changes create new challenges.
As your newborn grows into a young child, different stages give your baby new capabilities to be mobile and interactive. And they can present new challenges!
For your dog, newborn babies can be less engaging since they are less awake and on the move. Think about your baby's development and what it may mean to interact with your dog:
What to expect at 3 months with your baby:
What to expect at 6 months with your baby:
What to expect at 9 months with your baby:
What to expect at 1 year!
"Babies grow, dogs age, adjust management at every stage!" That's another Family Paws saying that reminds all of us to plan, practice, and adjust as our babies grow and live harmoniously with our dogs.
Now that you've got a solid overview of all things dog and baby, keep going with more ways to support your dog and child. Check out the next guides that dive into the details of each aspect of management and training to help babies, kids, and dogs live happily together.
If you have any questions on how to manage life with kids and dogs or other questions about your growing family life with your dog, just ask us in our Community Discussion.
Continue in our Kids and Dogs Channel where you'll learn everything you need to know for your dog from our community of Dogly Training Advocates.
If you need more personalized dog training guidance, get started in your dog's training plan here.
DISCLAIMER: The content of this website and community is based on the research, expertise, and views of each respective author. Information here is not intended to replace your one-on-one relationship with your veterinarian, but as a sharing of information and knowledge to help arm dog parents to make more informed choices. We encourage you to make health care decisions based on your research and in partnership with your vet. In cases of distress, medical issues, or emergency, always consult your veterinarian.